This morning’s blood pregnancy test (beta-hCG) was, not surprisingly, negative. It feels sad to know that the results are official, but it also feels good knowing definitively and to be able to let go of any residual, albeit suppressed, hope that was left. It’s difficult to understand why it didn’t work, but I know that is from a skewed frame of reference since our only other similar approach resulted in a twin pregnancy (and birth!). The other part of me realizes that it was silly to think we would beat the heavily-researched odds and percentages of success.
One odd thing happened though: the nurse at the fertility center this morning said to call on Cycle Day 1 (first day of the period) so that we can come in for the baseline ultrasound and get the medication for the next cycle…as if we don’t need to wait the off-cycle we were previously told about. Now I’m really wondering if maybe the off-cycle doesn’t apply because we did gonadotropins/IUI, not IVF. It’s Sunday anyway so I guess we’ll just have to call on a business day to find out the definitive answer.
But that statement could put a new spin on the plans we were thinking about just two days ago, in terms of waiting out one off-cycle or not. Molly and I were both in agreement when we decided that if it is recommended to wait one off-cycle before starting a new one, that’s what we would do – and we were able to come up with a lot of other reasons to justify that as well. But now, while it is unlikely, if our reproductive endocrinologist says that it would actually decrease our chances of getting pregnant by waiting an off-cycle, then I think we should just go for it now – no reason to unnecessarily decrease our chances. I think there may be a better chance that he’ll say it won’t make a difference if we wait one off-cycle or not, in which case I’m not really sure what we’d do. Although we may not even really have a choice, because we haven’t ordered the medication yet, which you have to start right away on Cycle Day 1 (or 2). Ugh, this is the type of thing that makes this whole process such a roller coaster. Goal #1 I guess will be to get in touch with our reproductive endocrinologist sometime between now and when Cycle Day 1 occurs, hopefully within the next 5-7 days, so we can try to figure out if we’re going right into another cycle or not.